Weekly Rochester Events #296: Mayfair Becomes Unfair

Thursday, September 9, 2004

Let me start out with words I try to avoid and why.

I avoid calling people retarded or a retard as much as I can because it's demeaning to those affected by mental retardation. I still use the terms now and again in an attempt at a humorous insult, but I try to keep those moments to circumstances when the behavior closely matches patterns of mental retardation, and not just when someone is being stupid or clumsy.

As for terms that demean homosexuals for no reason, like fag and faggot in some circumstances, assfucker, or dick-licker, I'm getting to the point where I don't even understand how they're an insult: the only reason they would be insulting is if you believe that it's bad to be gay. I also don't like using terms like pussy or sissy as an insult because the underlying logic is that women are inferior to men — I've even seen people try to insult men by accusing them of being a woman, or by comparison as in "throws like a girl."

Finally, there's two terms I especially avoid that demean blacks: nigger, and white-trash.

The reason I try not to use white-trash is much subtler than why to not use nigger. I feel that white-trash means that non-whites are implicitly trash. The problem is there's no such parallel term as black-trash. It's conventional in present-day speech to specify race or gender when it would either be ambiguous or when it is implied elsewhere — for instance, you'll often see the phrase male nurse but not female nurse because there is a stereotype that nurses are female. Likewise, by saying white-trash, the implication is that "human trash" is stereotypically non-white, so you have to clarify by specifying white.

Nigger should be obvious: it recalls the history of the opinions against black people including slave ownership, less-than-human status, segregation, hatred, and racism. Like any insult against a particular group, affectionate use of that insult by members of the group to other members takes on a distinctly different quality that underscores the common ground and brotherhood — whether it's black people calling one another nigger or homosexual men calling one another faggot — someone outside the group must demonstrate complete understanding to use the term affectionately, and that's nearly impossible to prove.

So what does that leave?

Well, there's a whole group of directly descriptive insults. There's wimp, weakling, and wussy implying a weakness of physical strength or character — of them wussy is questionable because it may be interpreted as a derivative of pussy. Insulting one's intelligence is straightforward with dummy or moron, questioning one's pride is as easy as ass-kisser, and implying that one is attempting to breed with their own mother is concicely, motherfucker.

I'll leave the universal, fuck as an exercise for the student.

One can also make direct comparisons to a person or object. Comparing to body parts is in the form of asshole, dickhead, fuckface, and more obscure things like 200-pound tumor is one form. Another is to compare to filth or function, such as piece-of-shit, douchebag, gutter-trash (which I find is an acceptable and effective alternative to white-trash) or simply turd (or terd) as Stan Marsh's sister Shelly is so fond of saying on "South Park".

But my personal favorite category is in the form of nonsensical but understandable insults. First, let me metion local comic Mike Dambra's term-du-jour: chucklebutt. Next, Bill Murray a s Peter Venkman in Ghostbusters gave me pus-bucket from the expletive, "Mother pus-bucket!" Finally, I have my own creation: fuck-knob.

Lastly, let me say that one can always modify and amplify any cuss or insult with the addition of a variety of adjectives — from the negative festering, stinking, and rotting, to the universal fucking, to the positive exemplary, superb, and perfect. The opportunities to swear are wide open, even if you avoid incindentally degrading anybody else.

Oh yeah, and it's Jan's birthday today, so if you see him, make sure to tell him he's a perfect fuck-knob.

T H U R S D A Y

The Dryden Theater at George Eastman House (900 East Ave.) will be showing Glen or Glenda starting at 8 p.m. Yes, it's true: they're showing Ed Wood's bizarre film about a transvestitism. [source: Eastman House calendar] The 7 Shot Screamers will be at The Bug Jar (219 Monroe Ave.) starting around 9 p.m. probably with some other bands. [source: Bug Jar calendar] Pure Kona Poetry Open Mic Night is at Daily Perks (389 Gregory St.) tonight starting at 7:30. [source: Daily Perks calendar] Find the Propaganda Box at The Liberty Pole (Liberty Pole Wy.) today from 9 a.m. to 7 p.m. playing independently produced videos giving an alternative view of political events than the mainstream media. [source: the proverbial grapevine]

F R I D A Y

From 6 p.m. to 9 p.m. tonight, it's Gallery Night at The Genesee Center for the Arts (713 Monroe Ave.) The Annual Instructors Exhibition (which closes on October 10) and The Student Exhibition which closes this Sunday will be at Genesee Pottery, and "County Fairs" Group Photography Exhibit will be up at The Community Darkroom until October 31. [source: Genesee Center for the Arts calendar] The Upstate Invitational art exhibit featuring artists Matthew Friday, Matthew Gehring, Myra Greene, and Richard Harrington will be at Rochester Contemporary Art Gallery (137 East Ave.) opens tonight around 7:30 p.m. and runs through October 17. [source: Rochester Contemporary calendar] The Dryden Theater at George Eastman House (900 East Ave.) will be showing The Big One starting at 8 p.m. Whatever you can say about Michael Moore, he certainly hits nerves. [source: Eastman House calendar] Montage Grille (50 Chestnut St.) will be hosting mostly groove rock band with modern jazz and blues influences, Sweatin' Like Nixon starting around 10 p.m. [source: Montage calendar] Find the Propaganda Box at The Liberty Pole (Liberty Pole Wy.) again today from 9 a.m. to 7 p.m. playing independently produced videos giving an alternative view of political events than the mainstream media. [source: the proverbial grapevine]

S A T U R D A Y

O'Bagelo's, 165 State Street, noon. The Memorial Art Gallery (500 University Ave., near Goodman St.) will be hosting The Clothesline Arts Festival at Memorial Art Gallery (500 University Ave., near Goodman St.) from 10 a.m. to 6 p.m. today and 10 a.m. to 5 p.m. tomorrow. [source: Memorial Art Gallery calendar] The Dome Center (E. Henrietta Rd. and Calkins Rd.) will be hosting The Landmark Society of Western New York's Rochester Antiquarian Book Fair in Minett Hall starting around 10 a.m. [source: Landmark Society e-mail] Prog in the Park featuring The Frogg Café, Random Order, The Land of Chocolate, The Mind Sky Band, The Izz, and Maelstrom Percussion Ensemble will be at Highland Bowl (South Ave. at Robinson Dr.) probably starting around noon. [source: JamBase calendar for Rochester] Today is another Bike Ride at High Falls from 10:30 a.m. to noon at The High Falls Gorge (Pont De Rennes Bridge.) The ride is designed to be relatively easy ... 10 miles or less along the Genesee Riverway Trail and on-road into the community. [source: City Hall press release] Over at Acme Bar & Pizza (495 Monroe Ave.) starting around 10 p.m. is bluesy rock band &mdash now as a duo! — Gionnie Clash. [source: the proverbial grapevine] Tonight at The Bug Jar (219 Monroe Ave.) is local rock favorites Eddie Nebula and the Plague, awesome punk-rock from The QUiTTERS, and rockabilly-influenced rock-and-roll band The Hi-Risers starting around 10:45 p.m. [source: Bug Jar calendar]

S U N D A Y

This evening at 7:15 p.m. at the Sentinel sculpture at RIT (One Lomb Memorial Dr., campus map image) is this year's Big Shot to kick off RIT's 175th Birthday. Wear dark clothes and bring a flashlight or electronic flash if you want to participate. [source: RIT Events Calendar site] The Bug Jar (219 Monroe Ave.) will be hosting Viva L'American Death Ray Music starting around 10:45 p.m. along with some other bands. [source: Bug Jar calendar] Kate Laux's Self-Portrait Collaboration Project closes tonight at artsound (#8 in the Public Market, off N. Union St., formerly The All-Purpose Room) [source: artsound website]

M O N D A Y

Over at Dinosaur Bar-B-Que (99 Court St.) starting around 10 p.m. is The Gamble Brothers Band. [source: JamBase calendar for Rochester]

T U E S D A Y

Tonight at Kilbourn Hall at Eastman Theatre (60 Gibbs St.) is part of the Faculty Artist Series featuring violist Phillip Ying, pianist Elinor Freer, and oboist Richard Killmer at 8 p.m. [source: Eastman School of Music calendar] Daily Perks (389 Gregory St.) is hosting an Acoustic Open Mic from 8 to 10. For this one, there's no microphones and it's pretty open ended. [source: Daily Perks calendar]

W E D N E S D A Y

Over at Hazelwood Lodge at Ellison Park (Blossom Rd. at Landing Rd.) starting around 7:30 p.m. is very good metal band Sulaco, Conifer, and tight, technical metal three-piece Bailey, Mason, Lickers. [source: band calendar] Tonight at The Bop Shop (274 N. Goodman St., in Village Gate Square) is The Angelica Sanchez Quartet starting around 8:30 p.m. [source: Bop Shop calendar] Over at The Bug Jar (219 Monroe Ave.) starting around 10:45 p.m. is To Live and Shave in LA, and noise-and-feedback with overdriven spoken word from Foot and Mouth Disease. [source: Bug Jar calendar] Up All Night Concerts presents excellent instrumental funk band The Filthy Funk, Monatomic, and Rhubarb at The Club at Water Street (204 N. Water St.) starting around 9 p.m. [source: Water Street calendar] Poor People United meets tonight and every Wednesday at 7 at St. Joseph's House of Hospitality (402 South Ave.) [source: the proverbial grapevine] Tonight from 8 to 10 is an Open-Mic Comedy Night at Daily Perks (389 Gregory St.) While once it was a workshop type of environment, it's now more-or-less a regular open mic ... by default it's still a place to try out new stuff. [source: Daily Perks calendar] Find the Propaganda Box on Monroe Ave. at Sumner Pk. today from 9 a.m. to 7 p.m. playing independently produced videos giving an alternative view of political events than the mainstream media. [source: the proverbial grapevine]