Weekly Rochester Events #349: Predictor of the Comet
Thursday, September 15, 2005
What the hell? Reinquist dies? Katrina wipes out New Orleans? Bob Denver dies? They finish demolishing the old Mount Hope Wegmans? I leave for three weeks and the world falls apart — when I got back I felt like I had to grab hold of the ropes and pull it all back together. Oh well, nothing better to do than promise to put up a major update with all the details (just like the last 5 trips I've taken) and post a stop-gap traveblog ... hold onto your seats, kids 'cause 3 weeks never seemed so long.
Starting at the end of the week before I left on August 21, I nearly killed myself trying to get the computer to put on a cool light show ... the hardware was willing but the programmer was weak. On Sunday morning, the 21st, I got up at 4 a.m., called off any coolness, and just went with a boring fade from red to green to blue to red and so on. I got the code written to automatically start the MP3 player ... pretty simple stuff by comparison. By noon I finished things up and got it running in the living room as a test. I pulled everything I was going to pack into the back yard and nearly freaked out that it was totally not going to fit in the car. Well, by 5 p.m. I had pared things down and got the whole thing packed. Whew.
So I got some food to eat and waited to see if I could think of anything I forgot. I got on the road by 6 p.m., antsy to get going. By 10 I got into that little chunk of Pennsylvania between New York and Ohio and I got sleep intermittently in the car (fortunately at times after I had stopped to do so.) By 6 a.m. I was in Plain City, Ohio (for real ... that's what it's called ... nothing like setting expectations low.) By 9 a.m. I was in Indiana, Illinois by noon, and crossed the Mississippi by 3 p.m.
I had long mused that Missouri's state slogan should be "Missouri is Missourable" and driving through it at 95°F with high humidity and no air conditioning, it really is. Strangely, they had these fully automatic hand-washing stations in the rest areas which dispense soap, run water, then run an air hand-dryer. It sort-of works.
I got to Kansas City around 7 p.m. Central Time and crossed into Kansas shortly after. I hit heavy rain and had to slow down, and I was the only one. Well, until we rounded a corner and found a semi-trailer on the side of the road and a car flipped onto its side in the fast lane ... there seemed to be a bunch of people helping already so I would just be another gawker in the way and moved on. I hit a rest area around midnight near Junction City, Kansas and slept until 6 the next day. I crossed the Colorado border around 9:15 Mountain Time on Tuesday. I got to Denver around noon and stopped in with my brother.
So far ... not too shabby: 42 hours from Rochester to Denver; a little more than a day and a half.
I got to check out this place The 9th Door (1808 Blake St., Denver, CO) which had this awesome tapas special: $2 each from 5 selections. I got a great mojita and a rum-like caipirinha and had their potatas bravas (spiced potatoes and sauces) this spectacular croquetas de hongas (mushroom and rice croquettes and sherry-mushroom sauce), and this beef-and-potato one with sherry sauce that the server recommended and that was great too. In the end I accidentally spent $30 by deviating from the cheap seats. Oh well. Continuing the numerological trend, my brother and I went to Forest Room 5 (2532 15th St., Denver, CO) to see some cool cellist but he wouldn't be on until much later ... we did get to see this young duo called The Ninja Biscuits. They were a bit green, but apparently had quite a following around Denver.
On Wendesday I met up with Elliotte (who left Rochester a week before I did and is now living in a van down by San Fransisco) at Capitol Hill Wild Oats (900 E. 11th Ave., Denver, CO) and we shopped and had lunch. Now that's how an organic food store is done. That night I joined the Denver Cruisers for their weekly ride around Denver. It was quite a blast, what with me on my little spiral bike. It turns out it's quite a sprinter and I can keep up if I try. Well, four bars and four-times-something drinks later and I got back to my brother's apartment to crash.
On Thursday I went to this cool German-food restaurant Cafe Berlin (323 14th St., Denver, CO) with Elliotte where I got to try all 7 of their great beers along with a really good meat-wrapped-in-cabbage thing. We walked around for a while and went to Mercury Cafe (2199 California St., Denver, CO) for another great meal ... I had been there last year for breakfast and had an awesome vegetarian omelette: the trick is to throw in some avocado.
I got back to my brother's place and worked on fixing a few things for The Bike With 2 Brains before dawdling around town.
Friday the 26th, Elliotte and I headed out to meet up with Sondra in Glenwood Springs around 2:30 and got in around 6. We went to The 19th Street Diner (1908 Grand Ave., Glenwood Springs, CO) and got some pretty decent food. We decided to get going after dark just to try and hit Utah. We all had CB's: me in my Civic, Elliotte in her mini-van, and Sondra in her RV ... our own little convoy. We ended up stopping around midnight at the Colorado Welcome Center about 20 miles from the border.
By 9 or so on Saturday we were in Utah, and crossed into Nevada around 4:30. Oh, and if you don't have to, don't stop in Wendover, Utah right at the border ... it's a creepy little town. Very bad vibe — I couldn't pin it down exactly, but, for instance, there didn't seem to be much effort made to remove (nor any comments to the contrary) to some pro-KKK graffiti in the bathroom. We hit this weird Chinese place in the small-ish town of Elko, Nevada — The Elko Dinner Station (1430 Idaho St., Elko, NV) which looks like a typical family-style American diner, but it's a Chinese food place ... we split a big dish of vegetable something and some egg rolls for pretty cheap. Next we picked up liquor (it's illegal to bring outside alcohol into and/or through Utah) at Albertson's Grocery Store (2582 Idaho St., Elko, NV) which is this big chain out west. Anyway, they had some sweet "Preferred Customer" deals on liquor and wine ... a 1.5L bottle of Jim Beam, for instance, was marked down from $26 to $19. You don't even have to sign any paperwork.
We stopped around midnight with 170 miles to go to get to Reno.
We got up around 7 on Sunday, hit the road, and got to Fernley, Nevada around 10 a.m. — that's the town that has the side highway that goes to Burning Man from I-80. We got into Reno and frustratingly hunted for a hotel, eventually settling on The Vagabond Inn (3131 S. Virginia St., Reno, NV) because it was the only place that could accomodate an RV. While everyone else was out shopping and preparing to stay the night and leave on Monday, I got antsy again and just had to take off around 4 p.m. — I was just there for a shower and to fill up my water bottles anyway.
I made it to Burning Man (The Man, Black Rock City, NV) right at 7 p.m. — just as the sun crossed the peak of the western mountains. Unpacking the car, my pal Jim Bean was right on top so I sucked on him and started setting up the tent. Before dark, Camp CampCampCamp was officially on the map. I donned my universal outfit for the week: a terry bathrobe and boxers then got on my bike and rode around a bit. (The look was inspired by the Dude from The Big Lebowski because it looked awfully comfortable, and from Arthur Dent in The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy — my state of mind seemed to fit both characters.)
Anyway, I met this guy Duck at Recycle Camp (whom I believe is the creator of their awesome can smasher) and we exchanged notes on custom bikes. I parked the bike back at my camp and started walking.
I met Jaf from Blunderland while he was driving around his giant tongue. From there I walked a bit and met a couple from Psychic Taxi — they'll bring you where you need to be with their rickshaw. It sure is simple not having to exchange money or communicate your destination. We ended up stopping at Life Sized MouseTrap and checking it out. I found it to be a bit boring ... it's exactly as its name states, and while kind of neat, it's not really art in my book.
I meandered around some more and people seemed to be impressed with the spiral bike which pleased me since I was in a place where some of the most cutting edge art and designs are presented. I got back to camp and crashed around 3:30.
Monday the 29th is the official start date. I got up and started assembling The Bike With 2 Brains. I start by assembling the frame upside-down to get the lower parts put together then I flip it over. Well, despite doing this 8 or 9 times at home and having a variety of riders on it during the past month — different weights, different strengths, and different levels of dynamic fatigue — the frame snapped in half at the two stress points.
I headed to Black Rock Hardware camp at the suggestion of this guy Cram (I think.) They had no welder, but I remembered that Recycle Camp did. I talked with Angry Butterfly who said she'd probably have a free moment on Tuesday morning and took pity and/or sent me searching for energy drinks and cheeseburgers for her. I went back to Hardware and ground off the paint and made pipe inserts to further strengthen the joint.
I went back to Kidsville and found Sondra. I went out to look for Elliotte but I couldn't find her camp. I did run into this guy Nathan and his group at their camp near Catharsis and 2:00 (the streets are alphabetically-named psychological terms [this year, as the theme is "The Psyche"] in rings starting with the non-alphabetical Esplanade about 2,100 feet from the central Man figure and the angular component of the address refers to the clock position from the man — he faces 6:00 and the city goes from 2:00 to 10:00 around him.) He had read about The Bike With 2 Brains and was looking forward to seeing it.
I got back to camp around 6 p.m. and Elliotte stopped by and we went to see Sondra. We took a trip around the city, starting with Colossus which is this rotatable machine with three arms that hold up 30 tons worth of steel and granite boulders. Below each boulder is a rope so people can pull it around and get it spinning. It's scary as hell pulling on one of those boulders for the first time.
From there we went to the Man sculpture in the middle of the city. Inside is a labyrinth of art installations separated by hidden and revolving doors. Most of the stuff in there is pretty cool ... unfortunately I lost track of Sondra and Elliotte and headed off on my own afterward.
Unfortunately it started getting colder than I liked faster than I liked and I was getting drunker than I liked faster than I liked. I got to bed around 10 p.m. ... if I was going to blow a whole evening, at least it was Monday.
I got up around 5 on Tuesday — my birthday — and walked around a little. I got to Recycle Camp around 9 or so with my parts. I hung out with the crew then helped Angry Butterfly repair the can crusher. She got my parts welded. Right in the middle of the job we had to stop and see "Hello Shiva" — a giant Hello Kitty with six arms to whom you can write a wish or a curse for her to grant — in part because Angry Butterfly is a big Hello Kitty fan.
So I got back and assembled the project. I got all the hardware done and there it was sitting on the dry lake bed of Burning Man. Hot damn. I put in a fresh battery and flipped it on and ... nothing. Well, the computer wasn't running but the power supply was drawing a bit of current. I realized the power supply spikes above 5 volts initially and it seemed to be latching up the computer which has an "Absolute Maximum" voltage of 5.5 volts. Wiggling the wires got it booted up and running, though.
I pushed it out to The Artery, stopping by Recycle Camp to show off the completed project. I signed in and had now officially completed everything for the grant requirement. I pushed it out to Lost Penguin which is a chill-space with couches and such where they give away chocolates and wine. While I was sitting there, only one guy stopped to even look at the project.
I got my bike and went back to Recycle Camp because Duck and I were going to drag race our custom bikes — I mentioned mine was a bit of a sprinter. We started at the last lamp post away from the man near Colossus and headed toward the man. He had an immediate lead and I could not get any closer to him. I might have thought it a draw if we started the same time, but I was exhausted and he still had more speed to go so i declined the rematch.
I headed back to where I left The Bike With 2 Brains but it was gone. I couldn't see it so I came back to camp and found that Ben and Babz brought it back, leaving a note in the dust on my car. Some other people tried it out and in the process seemed to loosen one of the wires. In the end, the computer had completely fried. So, in the last two hours of sunlight, I pulled all the existing chips and threw in a simple circuit to get all the blue lights to go on when it's dark.
My neighbor Troy and I figured out how to slowly ride it forward and took it way out to Alien Semaphore and left it there. We walked back, stopping at a couple projects along the way.
I met up with Sondra, Elliotte, and some other friends at Astral Headwash Along the way I got to try some absinthe ... bathtub absinthe, no less, in its full-potency wormwoodiness. I found another camp ... Crazy Dante's Used Soul Emporium and met this woman Flo. Her birthday is tomorrow, making her the person I've met whose birthday is closest to mine. As I was talking the absinthe started to kick in and my perception was that bright lights moved first and all the darker objects moved second ... I had to ask her to turn off the light around her neck so I wouldn't be so distracted.
Anyway, she and I had a great time together that night ... visiting several sculptures and going for art-car rides. A really great Playa-date and a fun way to round out a birthday.
Wednesday morning I got up and was dying for some real food. Not far from camp was the Black Rock Bagel shop which had great bagels with cream cheese and coffee. Around 10 I got going and started a hunt for The Bike With 2 Brains. I went way out to the north trash fence and headed back ... no luck. I did find some pretty cool art way out there, though.
I stopped by this place that had home made rootbeer. I met this cute girl Vivian ... we hung out around Lost Penguin for quite a while and parted ways so I could get to the potluck dinner at The Alternative Energy Zone, the village within which I'm camping. I had borrowed Troy's solar oven for the afternoon and my chili was good and hot. The potluck was great with lots of stuff ... someone even solar-baked homemade cookies.
Unfortunately I had to crash early again around 10 p.m. ... at least it's only Wednesday.
September 1 I got up and got pancakes with the people in Hoodville near the center of The Alternative Energy Zone. I brought some of my granola — which naturally wasn't as popular as pancakes. Afterward I was off again to try and find The Bike With 2 Brains. I was getting a little alarmed when I couldn't find it — I prepared myself to let it go, but I kind of thought I'd see it way off in the distance maybe once a day ... or at least have someone I know tell me they saw it, but no word at all.
I stopped by Borrachos y bicicletas bike repair shop and met Jay Bain who made the Black Rock City Rickshaw Fleet. I found him flustered in an attempt to make repairs to one of the rickshaws so I did what I could to help ... in part to just watch to make sure he didn't wreck anything or hurt himself. I also helped him decorate one of the rickshaws ... in fact the one pictured here on Tribe.net (let's hope those weird links are valid for everyone.)
This evening I had a plan. I went to this sushi camp at Delerium and 5:15 and they weren't ready yet (at sunset as advertised, but they would be when it's dark.) I was apparently the only person bold enough to just stay and chill out instead of go elsewhere. Nonetheless, I got a bit of vegetarian sushi, and the couple next to me brought some sake which was all really quite good.
After that I went to Coco Velvet right near my camp ... they would administer sake with syringes. I was "treated" by "Doctor" Frank for "smartness" and "cured" to "stupidity." I stayed there for a long time and drank lots of sake and got my medical license and did some administering of my own. It was an absolute hilarious blast.
After that things went kind of downhill. I was way too drunk and staggered around town for a long time, missing my camp many times. I knew I was near, but I couldn't walk straight enough to figure out the whole point-A-to-point-B thing. I probably got in around midnight or so and crashed.
Friday the Second I got up and went to hunt for the project again. Sondra and I were both having a day that was getting progressively worse. She and her boyfriend Reverend Tommy Tommy Tommy, Elliotte, and myself planned to hang out together that night but we got separated.
I tried to find them out at the clubs they said they were heading later but I never did. I did find, however, Simon whom I know from around here. I headed back to camp and crashed around midnight.
Saturday was the day of the burning of the Man, but I was just having an awful day. I never found my project at all and I started feeling trapped — after all, I'm responsible for removing it, and if I can't find it and it's still on the land, someone else will have to deal with it ... yuck.
Sunday, September 4 I got up before sunrise. I felt a bit numbed to the idea of hunting for the project again. However, I decided to systematically scour the city. I started at 6:00 and Hysteria — the furthest street — and rode from there to 2:00 and Hysteria. I then returned on Gestalt, back out on Fetish, then Ego, Delerium, Catharsis, Bipolar, and Amnesia ... in all nearly 11 miles. No project found. I took a brief break then started on the other half of the city ... 6:00 and Hysteria to 10:00, then back on Gestalt and ... found!
It was around Gestalt and 9:00 — pretty much as far away from my camp as you can get and still be inside the city. One of the forks broke and a tire had blown out in the back. It had been cobbled and patched — the tensioner spring on the generator had been replaced with some wire and a condom and the tire had been patched a bit with duct tape.
The Bike With 2 Brains was parked in front of this guy Gabriel's tent. He was somewhat incoherent, what with staying up for at least all night and probably still being drunk ... nonetheless, he said they called it the "Space Car" and had tons of fun on it. Another guy said he thinks the project appeared sometime around Friday in its broken state but couldn't be sure.
I biked back and told Troy about it. I grabbed some tools and the spare fork and went back to get it. I fixed the broken bits enough to be able to move it then put a strap on it and towed it back to my camp. I stopped by Borrachos y bicicletas but they had no spare 24" tubes, and I didn't find Jay who wanted to see it. At their suggestion, I took the tires and tubes off the back wheels and rode it on the rims. I got the MP3 player started again and took it to Kidsville so the kids there could play on it.
Sondra, Elliotte, and I walked out to the temple which they're going to burn that night. I had stopped by earlier in the week but it was much more somber than it was before. I left a note for my mom who's having some health-related problems. Also, this was the first time I heard about Katrina wiping out New Orleans — there were lots of notes about it and some newspaper articles. The beauty of the whole thing is they burn it to the ground — everything that sucks in life is destroyed, at least symbolically, letting us livings get on with what we do.
We walked around some more and got hold of some feta on our quest for cheese which we ate while watching the temple burn. I got completely wiped out during the burn ... maybe it was emotions or the catharsis of having my project locked to my car. Whatever the reason, I made a weary half-asleep pilgrimage back to my camp and crashed ... probably before 9 p.m.
Monday morning I got up early and started slowly packing. I met my other neighbor Donovan — Troy packed up and headed out yesterday. We talked and I packed things up. Our convoy finally started our way out around 5 p.m. We drove to Wadsworth, Nevada where the minor road to Burning Man meets I-80 and hunted for pizza. We finally found Pizza Shack (790 E. Main St., Wadsworth, NV) and — despite being terribly hungry for pizza — this was some of the best I've ever had. It was medium-thick crust with a crisp bottom, loaded with toppings including artichoke hearts and every other vegetable, and the mozarella was super fresh and stretchy. Wow. We talked to this guy Roy who suggested we try out Fitzgerald's Casino and Hotel (255 N. Virginia St., Reno, NV) and noted that they have the best cheeseburgers anywhere.
We drove all the way to Reno and found that Fitzgerald's has no RV parking so we went to The Golden Phoenix Hotel and Casino (255 North Sierra St., Reno, NV) where we stayed last year. The lots were all full but we managed to get the RV parked, got a couple rooms, showered for a long time, and crashed.
Tuesday the 6th I got up early and walked around Reno a bit ... what a shithole. Elliotte and I were in one room so Sondra, her kids, and her ex could "enjoy" their room. It was well worth the extra thirty bucks. Anyway, around 11 Elliotte and I checked out, dropped our luggage in the cars, and headed to Fitzgerald's for a cheeseburger. Unfortunately they not only weren't the best, they were pretty much the worst I've ever had. Sondra and company ate elsewhere yet had a similarly dismal culinary experience. The lesson learned: don't eat in Reno.
Sondra's ex took her kids back to the airport and Elliotte headed further west. Sondra and I got on the road and stopped at Sturgeon's Restaurant Casino (1420 Cornell Ave., Lovelock, NV) for some food. Heck, even here it was better than Reno ... the fries were good and the bread pudding was huge. We stopped at The Flying J Truck Stop (I-80 Exit 352, Wells, NV) and crashed for the night.
When I got up at 5 a.m. it was 42°F outside! Shit. Around 8 a.m. we made it into Utah. I finally found the gas station I stopped at last year — the place I stopped when I had sleep-deprivation-induced hallucinations that the shrubs on the side of the road were actually giant muffins — Skull Valley Station (I-80, Delle, UT). Just like last year it was incredibly expensive and in the middle of nowhere. I swear it really exists.
By 6 or so we got off at Grand Junction just across the Colorado border and looked for a cheap hotel with a bar. The logic was to get drunk and get cleaned. Unfortunately, everything was $45 and kinda shady. We stopped in Parachute, Colorado — the next sizable town. They had discovered oil there in the past year, so the hotels were booked, the gas was $0.30 higher than anywhere else, and it just generally sucked. We ended up making our way to Glenwood Springs again. We stayed at the Affordable Inns (51823 Highway 6, Glenwood Springs, CO) and I got a little sleep and a shower. We walked to town and found the only bar that was open: Springs Downtown Bar and Grill (722 Grand Ave., Glenwood Springs, CO). We stayed until close (more or less) and took a cab back to the hotel.
On Thursday morning, Sondra headed off to work and I drove to Denver. I got in before Adam got back home so I went to Paris on the Platte (1553 Platte St. #102, Denver, CO) not far from his apartment and used their Internet and got a decent sandwich and coffee ... although I got no further service, so I skipped any dessert. Later on I got cleaned up a bit more and headed back to The 9th Door (1808 Blake St., Denver, CO)— and this time I stuck to the cheap menu. I had their esparagos con jamon (esparagus with ham) and a glass of sangria just as happy hour was ending. Adam returned and we headed out to Old Chicago (1415 Market St., Denver, CO) and got a couple beers and their Italian Nachos which is essentially fried pasta with pizza toppings ... very good indeed. We also stopped at this place Pints Pub (221 W. 13th Ave., Denver, CO) where they have hundreds of kinds of scotch. I tried their geographically-devised sampler and found I liked scotch from the Highlands of Scotland best. We hung out a bit after but got home before 2.
I got out the door by about 11:15 the next morning and started heading home. By noon I was way outside Denver on I-70. That evening I slept at a rest area just outside Ellsworth, Kansas until morning. I continued driving and stopped at the heavily advertised Ozarkland (3233 County Road 211, Kingdom City, MO) ... it was an amusing country store, and they did have pretty decent fudge.
Around 3:30 or so I stopped at Funderburk's 66 Grill and Deli (402 W. Johnson St., Pocahontas, IL) and got a good mushroom-swiss burger and some really good onion rings. Apparently it had been a Phillips 66 station for 77 years or so. Around 9 I tried an excursion around Indianapolis and drove around the capital building and statue but I couldn't find a place to stop for a drink and to see some live music. I got a little spooked about what part of town I was in so I got back on the highway. Shortly afterward I slept for the night at some rest area.
On Sunday, September 11, I got up around 6 or so and hit the road. I stopped at Hamburger Inn (16 N. Sandusky St., Delaware, OH) It's a classic style diner with 3 U-shaped counters that the servers can get to from the inside. It was some of the best cooked eggs I've had and the coffee was quite good too. I got back on the road around 10:30. By 2:30 I stopped at the first rest area on I-90, and got into New York around 5. When I hit the short non-Thruway section of I-90 in Buffalo, traffic ground to a halt: the Bills game had just let out. Crap ... so close. I got off at Walden Street and drove all the way out to Corfu near Darien Lake to get onto the Thruway again.
I got back home around 7 p.m.
All told, it was about 5,682 miles in 21 days and an hour ... thankfully I only had to buy 135 gallons of gas to do it.
Whew ... the end.
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About the title ... Edmund Halley was born 349 years ago in 1656 and predicted the period of a comet that we now call Halley's Comet.
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